Sh!t That Annoys Me Wednesday 7/6/2011

Despite it being the birthday of Tenzin Gyatso, His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama, I'm still annoyed. I'm a terrible Buddhist.
1. Modern Pants-WTH? My dress pants are like a Chinese puzzle box. Two buttons, a clasp, a flap and a zipper. All these hoops almost guarantee that I'll be flashing someone because I forgot a step. When did clothing get so complicated? I remember when pants sat at my waist, had a button and a fly and...get this...belt loops! Yes-belt loops. Belt used to serve a function, especially for us small-waisted, hippy girls. I can't have shit hanging on my hips, I feel like my pants are falling down. Give me my damn "mom pants" back. I have the only figure in the world on which they are flattering.

2. "Politically active" people who do no research. If I get lectured by one more idiot who does no research other than repeating GOP talking points at me, or go off on a tangent about how the president hasn't done anything etc etc, but fail to see the error in this argument, I'm going to go postal. I'll admit, the president hasn't done as much as he could have, and I'm still pissed he caved on the original healthcare bill, but he's also being cockblocked on every decision. Where are the jobs? Ask John Boehner, who's congress hasn't passed a single bill for job creation. And while we're at it, why is the GOP suddenly against every decision they used to be for? Oh, that's right, because now the black man is pitching the idea, so suddenly it's not a good idea. I'm sick of the mean-girl politics that are happening in Washington. Never before have I heard an entire party actually state that they're only objective for the next 2 years is to prevent the president from succeeding in anything (it's true-Mitch McConnell said it.)

3. Fallout New Vegas. If I hear "Is it a dress?" one more time....

4. Fallout-MMU. Every once inn a while the fallout is so terrible it looks like I wasn't even aiming for my eyes. Some colors, no matter how you apply them, seem to migrate to your cheeks. And they're always some color you can't just convert into a blush look. Oh, it's easy enough to clean up (go makeup remover wipes) but the worst fallout always happens when I'm short on time.

5. Coupon Susie commercials. I try to avoid commercials  by DVRing everything so I can fast forward, but early morning Law & Order marathons are impromptu, so I have to watch commercials. What is with this chick. She's all wild-eyed and perky like she's tweaking or been up all night drinking a case of Jolt cola clipping her damn coupons. She's scary and the Jolt cola binge may explain her wardrobe and haircut that aren't very flattering. I'll say it again to all marketing departments: stop with the annoying spokespeople. If I got accosted by this crazy woman in a supermarket I'd assault her with vegetables and run away. No one should be that excited about coupons.